There's a huge amount to be said about the
black marriage meme going around, but I'm going to try and keep it
simple. Why? Because I quit blogging to spend more time with my family.
Here's what I want to stress. Marriage is boring and you know it. The
question is whether or not you are willing to sacrifice to go that
route. Now I want to slap around the people who don't.
Blacks looking for solutions in politics to fundamental problems
with ghetto communities only prove they have no faith (or experience)
in Family.
The less family you have, the more institutions you need. This is a universal constant.
Look to gays, libertines, socialists, communists, Afrocentrics for
your examples. Programs, politics and institutions mean more to them
because they have fewer and weaker social supports than families. The
same, by the way, goes for eloping couples who cut off their parents.
We are a society of individual rights, but there are great costs to
be highly individual. I don't believe, quite frankly, that the majority
of Americans are up to the task - that's why the majority of us are
middle class. If we were all JLo or Henry Kissinger or Jacques
Cousteau, then we could all have opinions and personalities of merit.
We wouldn't expect such talents to settle into the stabilizing and
often phlegmatic moderation of family life. But most of us are not, and
most of us need it.
This is why so many leftists try so desparately to portray
themselves as 'creative' - when about all they can do is parade around
naked or talk themselves into alternative universes. They're just like
most of the 60s 'rebels', just peddling shock value and constantly
running away from and afoul of simple middle American, middle class
values.
Now let's talk about black culture for a minute. What passes for
black popular culture needs a diaper change. It could be summed up in
four words 'The Flavor of Love'.
There is really nothing special about the dysfunction of Flava Flav.
He's a Playa. But because he's ugly, most people see right through him.
But the romance with the idea is the same. Put somebody good looking in
his place, say Erika Badu, and you have the same deal. I'm having a
hard time engineering what the socialization of young blacks is like
these days - How does it differ significantly from the Playa track? I'm
saying so in the context of what the black marriage deficit strongly
suggests, namely that a substantial proportion of black singles would
rather socialize with niggas and bitches, than with other ethnics who
are more marriage-minded. Check me if I'm wrong and point me to the
nearest black speed dating club.
My experience online is that there is a huge surfeit of "whats wrong
with black men, what's wrong with black women" arguments. These are
directly parallel to the deep furrows in the brows over the future and
degraded status of hiphop. So many black singles are deep in that limbo
- holding out for a hero or a shero and all too often winding up with
zero, or making single parent lemonade.
This is all about love. What will you sacrifice for love?
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