Jail!

Inevitably, people talk about America's 'Prison Industrial Complex'. Why do Americans jail so many people on a per capita basis? It's because we value property and morality, it's part of the American Dream. In other words, we do it for you, you peasant!

To understand this, all you have to realize is that we are punishing more crime than other countries. Very specifically, you cannot bribe policemen or judges in America. If you want to be a petty theif, drug dealer or thug, America is the wrong country for you. Elsewhere, you can get away with it. Here, you cannot escape the justice system. Consider the crime of assault. Notice that there is also aggravated assault and assault with a deadly weapon and assault and battery.  The latter crimes are more serious, but the former remains a crime punishable by jail. Breaking and entering. Theft. Grand theft. Grand theft auto.

What is the difference between theft and grand theft? Grand theft means you are stealing something worth more than $1000. Ahh. Now we are getting somewhere. America is willing to send people to jail for crimes that don't even cost $1000. And it obviously cost more than $1000 to jail them. To arrest them, send them to trial and then house and feed them in jail costs way more money than that. What are we trying to prove?

We are trying to prove that crime against people who aren't rich is still crime, and it will be punished.

Who cares if I punch you in the face? Who cares if I break your daughter's leg? Who cares if I dent your precious automobile? Who cares if I steal your TV? The American criminal justice system. And that's why America puts so many people behind bars. Because we care about crimes against peasant nobodies like you and your tedious desires, your petty ambitions, and your peace of (tiny) mind. We save you from the consequences of your predictable, miserable failures. And this is because we have a liberal plurality. Let me remind you about one of the differences between conservatives and liberals. Conservatives use the strength of the family and private institutions to protect against the abuses of the state. Liberals use the power of the state to protect against dysfunctions of private institutions and family. Who wants more jail? Liberals want more jail.

You are correct to believe we live in a police state. It's more accurate to say that we live in a first responder state. There are millions of people employed by the government, federal, state and local, to take care of yon bohunks in their emergencies. All you have to do is pick up your pocket communication device, any time of the day or night, punch three buttons and whine out your complaint, and some officials will get involved in your life and help you out of your little jam.

Bullies text threats to a fat girl online? Call 911. Rowdy teenagers throw a brick through your window? Call 911. Drunk college students set a trashcan on fire? Call 911. Your dumbshit husband treats you like dumb shit? Call 911. Operators are standing by to send all those bastards to jail. 

If you could take care of yourself, you wouldn't have to pay for somebody else to take care of you. If we in the public ignored your complaining and told you that you were on your own, there would be no public law and regulations, an therefore no public system to get into your business. We would be under no public obligation to take over your private failure. 

But then that wouldn't be America, would it?